Insanity
by Karen-the-Great
Summary: Misaki can't stand his loneliness. The white walls of his bedroom drive him insane. Staying at Shizume City Mental Institution was like sleeping in a snake pit, tense. No room in his bed to move. There is no rest for the wicked, nor for the bereaved. Ghosts from the past lead doctor's to think Misaki's disturbed. /A formal apology on the inside and a new chapter to start us off/
1. Author's note

**Author's Note**

**I have to say that at first I was upset at how everyone was leaving negative comments on my story. I didn't think I used Candylit's entire script, I thought I was basing my own on such a good idea. Then, I went back and reread his/her story and realized that I did, in fact, similarly base my story on Candylit's. In respect, I have taken the first chapter of Insanity down and replaced it with this apology. I do sincerely apologize to you Candylit and give all credit of this story to you, as it is rightfully yours. Instead of using this first chapter I will replace it with my second chapter. This chapter will basically start where the first left off, Misaki leaving to the mental institution. From there, I will create my own plot. I do like the idea of a bereaved Misaki grieving over the death of Saruhiko, and even going as far as to start seeing him in his death, but I will not be using Candylit's script. Once again, I sincerely apologize to everyone I offended, especially Candylit.**


	2. Chapter One

**Author's Note**

**Here's the new chapter. As promised I diverted this story from Candylit's. Hopefully you can all enjoy this one properlly.**

**Insanity: Chapter One**

Misaki denied love. To scared and too fragile to grasp its reins. He denied love and yet he fell deeply into it. It grabbed him by the wrists and pulled him by the hair, kicking and screaming, eventually burying him with its roots. Misaki cursed its name and he pushed further away from it, but deny as he did love still got the better of him. He denied deeply and he loved deeply too. This is what made it so hard to let go, no matter how many times his past told him to do it anyway.

Childhood was something Misaki missed out on. He'd fallen victim to the sins of his parents. Prayed upon and mistreated, he had to cope with life in solitude. With a drunk father and a mother that hardly came out of her mind's delusions, Misaki was left alone. There were times when Misaki would get the occasional beating, but his mother was the one who got the bad end of his father's wrath, most of the time. Things never really went well in his home life. They never really went well anywhere else either. Bad things just seemed to follow him wherever he went.

Sometimes, in the midst of all the bad, Misaki felt a rush of excitement. Like that one time he got a really good score on his math test in third grade. His teacher even gave him a sticker. Misaki couldn't wait to show it to his father, hoping for some sort of approval or praise. He didn't get either and somehow, later on, it ended up in the garbage. By the end of the day, Misaki thought he should have given it to his mother instead. She would have at least kept it for his sake.

Those days, when he was young, Misaki wasn't always lonely. He could say, out of everyone he'd ever known at the time, he had loved his mother like any child should. He'd get angry and scared whenever his father would start beating her. Misaki was only able to watch, unless he wanted to be next. As a child, he didn't want his father to hurt his mother the way he did, but he couldn't help it. In the end, her cries would live with him as he grows older and as he watches his mother fall into ruin. She becomes senile and insane, mocking him to the point where Misaki would wish he could just do the same. Wherever she went, she never did take Misaki with her.

Once in awhile, there were times when Misaki would catch his mother in one of her lucid states. In those few minutes, everything would be okay. She'd thread her fingers through his hair and caress his cheek, gently, like she used to. He'd get to hear a rare "I love you," or an occasional "You're such a good boy." It made him feel good again and the world would just fall back into place. Everything was okay. His mother made him human, it's what kept him from disappearing. Misaki was always whole again, until she'd start to slip away. All of a sudden she'd go into a world of dreams, leaving him behind, no matter how bad he wanted to tage along. During those times, Misaki felt his humanity drifting off, slowly fading like a dimming light.

By the time middle school came, Misaki was used to getting pushed around. His father did it and bullies were no exception. For a while it seemed like he made some friends, but it didn't really last for long. He realized that the friends he made were just a bunch of kids who were afraid to go against what he said. Apparently, all the mistreatment in his life made it where he went from being bullied to being the one who did the bullying. At first, Misaki didn't really mind. Whatever, at least no one picked on him anymore. In the end, it became apparent that being alone was something Misaki didn't really enjoy. The only thing was, he scared everyone away.

So, one day as Misaki was walking to school, he couldn't help but interfere when he'd seen a group of tall, masculine students threatening someone much smaller in a back alley. He stepped towards them, not really caring if he got beat up really bad.

"Come on," said one of the big, ugly students. "Just give us your wallet, we know you got big cash." The smaller kid didn't say anything. He just strared straight ahead, into the eyes of his ugly bully, as if getting threatened was a normal, everyday thing. "Didn't you hear me, you little shit, give us your wallet! We know your daddy's rich!"

"It's not like I need it anyway," the kid said, as he was pushed up against the alley wall. He took his wallet out of his pocket and threw a very large wad of cash in the bully's face. It wasn't a really good move, seeing as the bully just screwed up his ugly face and turned an angry red. "You little rat!" The bully raised his large, painful looking fist, ready to swing.

"Hey!" Misaki yelled into the alley. He took a few steps closer, only about ten feet away from the large group. "If you want money, why don't you just get a job?" Misaki smirked at the boy who was holding the other kid up against the wall. "But then again, I guess you're all to stupid to find one."

The group of heavily built students, who probably played some type of rugid sport, advanced on Misaki. The other kid was let go of and left up against the wall. "You're gonna eat your words!" said the jerk who was previously about to pummel the smaller boy, presumably the leader. He raised his fist again, this time towards Misaki who was about to dodge. The fist never came, since the bully was pushd to the floor. Misaki looked foward, staring as the kid from beore rubbed his hand.

"That was for the save." The kid gave Misaki a blank face, but he just guessed that's how he probably thanked anyway who did anything for him. The two put up a good fight, but eventual lost due to the unfair advantage. They both ended up leaning against the alley wall, exhausted and panting. Bruises and cuts were strewn across their faces. Neither seemed to pay any mind, since they both stared at each other with a look of pure excitement.

There was a placid silence that weighed over their heads. It wasn't until Misaki gave a soft snort that it was lifted. Soon, Misaki folded in on himself, laughing as he clutched his stomach. The other kid raised a pefectly shaped eyebrow, confused on how this was all so hilariously funny. Maybe exciting, but not funny.

"What are you laughing about?" He questioned. Misaki eventually calmed down, evening himself out with a few short breaths.

"Sorry," Misaki said, as he wiped away a stray tear. "That was just the most amount of excitement I've had in a long time." He smiled brightly at the boy, causing the other to blush slightly.

"Yeah, well...whatever," He looked away.

"Did you see the looks on their faces when you knocked that dude on his ass!" Misaki grabbed onto the other boy's shoulders and shook him in the rush of his lingering excitement. "Man, you were so awesome! Really, really brave." Misaki's hands were brushed away as the other shyly pryed them off.

"I guess."

"I'm Yata Misaki, by the way." Misaki straightened up and held his hand out towards the boy. He grabbed the boy's hand and shook it when he didn't make any move to do so himself.

"Yata...Misaki," the boy tested.

Misaki scoweled, scrunching up is face as if in consentration. Turning away, he grabbed a lock of his hair and twirled it around his finger. It looked like he was in deep thought, but the boy doubted that was even possible. Eventually Misaki faced the boy, a look of seriousness on his face. "I've decided that you can call me Misaki, if you'd like." The other boy blinked. Whatever, he thought. Misaki blushed.

"A-anyway!" he diveretd. "What about you? What's your name?" Misaki tilted his head, almost forgetting to even ask. The other only blinked again.

"Fushimi Saruhiko."

"Saru...hiko." Misaki tested the name out against his tongue. Saruhiko nodded. He then broke out into a huge, dominant smile, which was rare nowadays. "Saru-chan!" Saruhiko visibly twitched. So tacky.

"Saruhiko is fine."

"Saru, then!"

"Do whatever..."

Misaki's smile softened, his blush turning a light shade of pink. Saru, yes, it sounded so right.

"Say...let's be friends." It only made sense, he thought. It's been a long time.

"Okay..."

Today was a good day. A really good day.

"So, Misaki." Saruhiko roused. Misaki looked up.

"Yeah?"

"Misaki?" He jumped out ofhis skin, before settling back down again. Slowly, his tired eyes drifted upward, landing on the white coated figure in front of him. "Misaki what are you thinking?" The white coated figure, Mrs. Takizawa, leaned in her seat, notepad in hand. She was his pyschiatrist.

Misaki stood quiet, slouching in his chair, across from Mrs. Takizawa. It had been a long three months since he was admitted into Shizume City Mental Institution. He still couldn't shake them off. He's been staying quite, but all they do is ask more questions. His secrets are being probed at and Misaki knows they'll keep trying. He'll keep trying too.

"Nothing."

Mrs. Takizawa sighed. She adjusted her glasses and put her notepad aside. Misaki jumped when she layed her hand on his knee. She looked into his eyes, he looked back. Mrs. Takizawa's lip twitcheed up into a smile.

"You're a fighter," she admitted. Leaning back, she took off the glasses that were on the bridge of her nose and set them next to the notepad. Misaki looked into the lenses. He could see his reflection. It was hideous. "At least tell me, are you still seeing him?"

A heavy silence was dropped overhead. Still looking into the lenses, Misaki let out a shaky breath. She asked him this question everyday. "No," and it was the truth.

Smiling, Mrs. Takizawa wrote something down in her notepad, probably thinking she made some sort of progress. She didn't.


	3. Chapter Two

**Author's Note**

**My second chapter for Insanity. I wasn't really sure what to do at first. I changed a lot of things around. Pretty happy with the final product. Plus it's my birthday so yay! Also, an early birthday chapter to Saruhiko because I won't be posting on that day. It's gonna be short. Anyway, here you are.**

**Insanity: Chapter Two **

That day was coming. That one specific day where Misaki would get overexcited and celebrate each separate, passing moment that it would bring. That one good day where everything was perfect, even if it wasn't his. That day was always marked on his calender, circled in a vibrant shade of red. It would stare at Misaki tauntingly, when he'd flip through the pages just to count how many days were left. That day, as the weather got colder and the leaves changed colors, made November feel like the first day of spring. It felt new. It felt fresh. Nothing could ever make that day feel any less than what it was. Misaki had loved that day. He had always cherished it, even though he was the only one that ever did. Now, he wasn't so sure anymore.

Waking up that morning didn't feel so bad. He slept better than usual and his mood was good. The white walls around him shined in the morning glow that came from the window. It made the room feel a bit warmer from the chill November sent through the cracks of the window and the space under his door. His blankets were heavy, which held in the warmth his body gave and just made him want to stay in bed all day. Unfrotunately, his nurse came in at that very moment, demanding that he rise out of bed and start a good day. A _very_ good day, she had stressed.

"Come on now, can't keep the day waiting," Yumi, his nurse, said. She pulled back the covers, taking away the warmth Misaki had previously been enjoying. He groaned, falling back onto his pillow and closing eyes. He could see the sunlight from behind his eyelids, prompting him to do as Yumi said and get out of bed. He didn't agree.

"The day sould let me sleep in and go away," Misaki said. His eyes were still shut, not being able to will himself out of what was left of his warmth. Yumi only chuckled.

"Come on now, get up." She patted his cheek and gave his hair a short ruffle. It only made Misaki want to cuddle deeper into his pillow. "It's a good day, this November seventh, a little bit warmer than the beginning of this."

Misaki's eyes quickly opened themselves, widening at the expense that life was giving him right now, at this very moment. It wasn't until now that he remembered what today was. Sitting up slowly, he left his body soften. Slumping his shoulders and letting his eyes droop lower, like they usually did. Today had been diferent. All of last month he had been willing himself to forget about this day. Misaki manipulated himself into thinking that nothing was out of the ordinary, perfectly normal. A passing day. Yumi didn't notice the gravity of what she wrought upon him.

"Is something wrong?" She questioned, frowning at the change in his behavior.

"No, nothing's wrong,'' he whispered. Misaki, at that moment, truly wanted to curl back up ino bed and pass the day without facing it at all.

_"Happy birthday!" He exclaimed into the ear of his best, now deaf, friend. Misaki swung his arms around the very slim waist of Saruhiko, tightly embracing him. Today was a special day, he thought. Saruhiko, on the otherhand, frowned at the mention of it. He let Misaki hold him tightly, only because they were the best hugs he'd ever had. Misaki let go, grinning up to the face of his favorite person. "Happy birthday," he repeated._

_"Please, don't make this a big deal," Saruhiko drawled, clicking his tongue once. This only made Misaki's grin widen. He fished into his school bag, trying to find something at the bottom. Saruhiko already knew that it was a gift. Finally, grabbing whatever he was looking for, Misaki held it up to the face of his not so enthusiastic friend._

_"Ta-da!" He sang, waving his gift in the air. "Their tickets to a robotics and automation convention!" Saruhiko's uniterested facial expression did not leave his face, but his eyes betrayed him as they twinkled with supressed delight. It was then, as Misaki's smile widened at the sight of them, that he knew he had caught Saruhiko in his web._

_"Thanks but no thanks," the taller declined. Misaki waved the tickets in the air again, excitedly, knowing that he'd get his way in the end. "No," Saruhiko stressed. Misaki pouted, looking up at his friend in mock disappointment. _

_"..."_

_There was a pause. The pout deepened. Saruhiko stared._

_"Tch, fine."_

_Misaki grinned and once again embraced Saruhiko in the rush of his excitement. The other sighed, not at all disturbed by the strength that was put around his waist._

_In the end, their trip was amazing and the day could only brighten more._

_"I love it when your birthday comes, Saru."_

_"Okay."_

Misaki lifed his head off of the pillow and pushed himself out of bed. Yumi watched, knowing she had said something wrong. She could tell as Misaki glared outside his window, eyeing the sun beyond the strong, clean glass.

"Are you sure you're okay?" She asked. For a moment, Misaki was silent.

"I'm fine," he replied. "I just really hate the seventh day of November."

Yumi furrowed her brow, not sure what that really meant. She also wasn't sure why Misaki glared at the sun, as if he was angry at it for brightening and warming this good day.


End file.
